I finally had a good sleep last night. My sleep is very inconsistent and in the past week hasn't been great. I slept very well last night, although I'm still groggy and tired this morning. I think I know why though. My physical results came in yesterday and my iron levels are still low. My PCP wants me to take iron twice a day now and then retest in a few months. I wonder if that has to do with the brain fogginess, etc I've been feeling. I think once my physicals come out 100% healthy, I might try to stop the buspirone (anxiety med) and see how I feel then.
My iron also explains why I was so sick after the 5k. I never should've done it. I wasn't in the place for it. I really am trying to focus on my health, so I'll be looking at more iron rich foods to incorporate into my diet.
Today for some reason I woke up feeling strong. Strong in spirit, like I can do this. I know these things often only come for a minute, an hour, or a day. So far never longer than a day, but right now it's here. I feel love today too. I dunno if my babies are with me or what, but I feel them. I hope this feeling doesn't pass too quickly.
Their urn came in yesterday. Perfect day for it. I love it! I think it's perfect for them. Not at all the crib I'd hoped to be buying, but just like with any crib, it was bought with all the love in the world because they deserve it and more.