Friday, July 28, 2017

4 months

I'll start with the cute one and then go into the PPD/PPA update.

Can you believe Miss Anna Belle is 4 months????  I sure can't either. She is all kinds of active. She's loving her jumparoo and sit in piano toy and this weekend I'm getting her an exersaucer. She also loves her doorway bouncer and playmat. She is so sweet and smiley almost all the time and crying is reserved for hungry and/or tired. She coos a lot too and I think she'll end up being an early talker.

Even though she turned 4 months yesterday, I wanted to post today after her pedi appt. She is 14 lbs and 23" tall. She's short in height and average in weight. She has eczema and some bad red areas from it. Pedi is prescribing a steroid cream to help with the worse areas and I'm to use eczema lotion as much as I can. Her head is slightly flat, but nothing that shouldn't correct herself. She's developmentally on target.

Here's a comparison with big sister Kate. Big sister weighed 16 lbs. 5 oz and was 24" tall at four months.

Here's some other fun photos of Anna taken in the last month

Big Sister

Things are not great in this department. Katie very strongly dislikes Anna. She asks us to take her back. She won't interact with her and has tried taking her toys away. She also gets mad if she's in certain playthings, like the swing. If Anna requires "too much" attention, then Katie responds by peeing in her panties. I was hoping she'd be over this stuff by now, but no. For a while it was got bad where anytime Anna was being held or fed she was engaging in dangerous behavior like jumping from furniture. Luckily this has stopped. I'm having a hard time with this situation and honestly I'm just very sad about it.


Not sure where I left off with this, but Wellbutrin didn't do anything for me. I ended up seeing my pedi two weeks ago and have started on Zoloft. Since starting it I haven't had any major breakdowns or crying fits. He also increased my Klonopin and unfortunately I need it most days.

I feel very disconnected and still sad, although I guess more functional, especially now that I'm not breaking down. I'm still very upset with myself for this, but I guess it is what it is.


  1. Hopefully the Zoloft will help even more in the coming weeks, since it takes awhile to peak. Continuing to pray for you. Hang in there, you have so much to deal with. I'm praying for Katie, too. It's such a hard age that she's at anyway, but I'm hoping she will gradually accept her sister more and be more herself.

  2. I've been following your blog for awhile via the April 2017 birth club - haven't yet commented. Just wanted to send a note of encouragement. I haven't dealt with PPD, but it's an illness and so glad you're getting treatment. My three year old also despises my baby, so we're right there with you. I'm so sure it will pass!

  3. Anna is beautiful!
    Hang in there momma- little kids are difficult- but I'm sure Katie will warm to her sister one of these days.
    Remember you're doing the best you can- there is no such thing as a perfect mom